I am not using the end of the Finals as an excuse to disappear for the summer. We will be here forever. Forever and ever. And ever and ever.
But some things are afoot — top secret special new things have come to light things — and between that and a few long-form, still-simmering-on-the-stove things that I need the weekend to finish up, time restraints round this way have precluded me from helping provide the nation with what it desperately needs. (Luckily, Sports Guy was here for that. This was predictable, but, c’mon, Bill, we don’t need you wasting your time rebutting foolishness. I guess he won’t be buying this.)
Sorry bout that. But really, what’s left to say? Matt Moore of Hardwood Paroxysm pretty much summed it up. (Although Shaq did it even better.) If Odom are Ariza played well, the Lakers weren’t going to lose. And that’s what happened. Maybe the Magic can turn it around in Game 6? We’ll see.
So where does Kobe rank on the All-Time list now? Slam just “remixed” the Top 50 Players of All Time and has him at #12 (although they did it prior to the Finals).
And, yeah, it’s 6:00 on a Friday so I’m gonna go ahead and consider this collection of nothing an actual post. Meanwhile, look, a photo from @lowposts with the caption: “Well now you’re just bein’ an asshole, Michael.”
Yes, I know, digging all this up proves that I’m quite the investigative journalist. Bring on the Pulitzer.
UPDATE: Can’t believe I forgot these three photos of the Waltons. And just for fun, here’s Kobe vs. MJ in the 1998 All-Star Game.
Since nothing but needless All-Star bickering is going on today and I have to post something to avoid the flaming dogshit on the porch treatment again (cut it out, mom), here’s a few videos from Inside the NBA last night.
The first features a remixed clip of Shaq who apparently was carried onto the court by the Suns’ scrub players last night. The TNT interns apparently thought it would be funny to put Chuckster’s head in front of Shaq and wait for Kenny to make “He’s fat” jokes. Unsuprisingly, it was a little funnier than it should have been. More importantly, we have Webber busting out his Tony Parker impression repeatedly, which is easily my favorite culturally insensitive but widely-embraced-regardless development of this NBA season
And here’s CWebb, Glove and Kenny throwing out some old school/new school NBA duos with somewhat similar games and deciding who is better. Predictably, the old-timers get unwarranted props. I mean, Tom Chambers was sorta sick wit it and all, but you’re really taking him over Dirk, GP? Although just as inexplicably, he takes Nate Robinson over Muggsy, who could flat out play D.
Someone mentioned the other day how it was weird that The Glove tends to be so dismissive of defense in his analysis when that is the exact thing that made him a Top 10 point guard of all time and a first-ballot Hall of Famer.
But since Gary Payton also tends to be fucking awesome constantly, it’s not really gonna sway my opinion. It’s sorta, how you say, like antlers on a hot chick. Whatever.
And just because some of you theoretically come here to find out information about what is actually going on in the NBA, here’s their takes on the Spurs this season. Boring.