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Chuckster

The Top 50 NBA Commercials of All Time

by Jared Wade on April 12, 2010 at 1:28 am · 8 comments

mars blackmon

In the Spring of 2007, I was just a young pup in this NBA blogging world. Since then, I have accumulated literally dozens of readers and made untold tens of dollars writing about the NBA, but back then the only people reading this blog were me and Drop Dead Fred. (He didn’t even like it … I just spammed his Gmail account with links to my posts.)

Then, on April 4, 2007, I did a post called “The Top 50 NBA Commercials of All Time” that got linked to from Henry Abbott’s new ESPN version of TrueHoop and a cavalcade of other NBA blogs that probably don’t even exist anymore and, like, 40,000 people showed up. Since my previous high in any day was somewhere south of 4 unique users, it was pretty cool.

Unfortunately, within the year I switched hosting companies and perhaps-due-to-nonpayment (who remembers really?), I lost pretty much all my old content in the transfer. It seemed like a bummer at the time, but honestly the commercial thing and like three other posts were probably the only not completely terrible things I ever did. Still, losing stuff sucks.

HOWEVER, through the miracle of the a tech-smart friend of mine, I was recently able to recover some stuff. And so, mostly because I want to put it back in my archives, I’m re-posting it as it was originally posted verbatim in April, 2007. (Thus, forgive the omission of any spots from the last three years that warrant inclusion.)

Additionally, this may as well be the formal launch of “The NBA Commercial Project,” which will be an attempt to gather links to video for every NBA commercial ever made. We’ll start with just these 50 and build on that. And that’s where I’ll need your help. Head over there and drop links to videos in the comments.

Just do it (wocka, wocka, wocka).

Check the full, original Top 50 after the jump.

[click to continue…]

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70 Missed Dunks

by Jared Wade on April 11, 2010 at 8:57 pm · 0 comments

This sounds like a really dumb video. And it probably is. But for some reason, watching seven minutes of the “top” 70 missed dunk contest dunks in NBA history is rather entertaining. Much more entertaining that the 2010 Dunk Contest at least.

Here are the highlights:

  • At 0:56, Terence Stansbury falls down comically.
  • At 1:15, Jerome Kersey, yes, that Jerome Kersey, awkwardly flails at a self-lob attempt, which leads to this comment from the announcer: “I don’t think he wanted to do it with the left hand, Steve.” I think you’re correct, Phil. Also that’s what she said.
  • At 1:45, Shawn Kemp’s misses a windmill that probably could have won this year’s contest.
  • At 2:04, as always, John Starks sucks.
  • At 2:25, a human being actually says this following about Clarence Weatherspoon: “He reminds me of a young Charles Barkley.” Then Clarence airballs a dunk.
  • At 3:00, Antonio Davis severely overestimates the amount of air in a basketball.
  • At 3:19, I learn that a guy named “Jamie Watson” apparently once played in the NBA.
  • At 3:38, Darrell Armstrong makes a reverse layup.
  • At 4:06, we see the infamous Michael Finley cartwheel.
  • At 4:57, J-Rich misses his attempt at a 360 elbow hang. That kid just wasn’t human.
  • At 5:06, they inexplicably show only one of Birdman’s 387 straight misses.
  • At 5:15, Amar™e drinks some serious Sprite — reverse Sprite even.
  • At 5:21, Iggy damn-near decapitates himself.
  • At 5:35, we hear this non sequitur from Sir Charles: “I think Big Baby was eating all his food.”
  • At 6:20, we see the best dunk that Shannon Brown had after they #letshannondunk.

Watch the whole thing below. And here’s the full video of all of Birdman’s failed dunk attempts since they somehow only included one. (video via Dime)

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Chuckster in a Sombrero

by Jared Wade on March 25, 2010 at 8:44 pm · 0 comments

Self-explanatory, really. And that’s why it rocks. (via @jose3030)

charles barkley sombrero

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Conan O’Brien at the 1995 All-Star Game

by Jared Wade on January 24, 2010 at 1:17 am · 2 comments

Did you hear about this Conan guy? Apparently he’s a big deal. In just like seven months he went from pretty funny guy who hosted a show that was on past my bedtime to guy who hosted a show for old people to guy who is such a sympathetic figure for being jobbed over by his bosses that he inspired a bunch of grown men to call another grown man “CoCo.”

C’est la vie.

The whole mess was such a sad display of “crap wins” and “actual funny isn’t actually funny to very many people” that it’s pretty depressing. But the outpouring of support for Conan does at least go to show that there ultimately are a lot of people who do actually enjoy stuff that doesn’t only cater to the mainstream. So that’s cool.

More importantly, here’s some video of Conan back when he was really underground-ish-er back in 1995. He visits the All-Star Weekend going on in Phoenix and chats it up with Dikembe, Shaq, thin Barkley, awkward Scottie Pippen, looks-exactly-the-same-in-2010 John Stockton and David Robinson, who explains that he got nicknamed the Admiral because — and he’s not sure why — people didn’t want to call him “seaman.”

Seriously. He says that. (video via NBA Offseason)

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