The NBA Logo Ranking Project:
#25 – Minnesota Timberwolves

by Jared Wade on August 21, 2009 at 5:05 pm · 5 comments

How do you mess up a wolf? It’s essentially a killer dog. I could find you probably 10,000 fifth graders with better murderous canine drawings on their Trapper Keepers than this Sherwood Forest landscape painting that the now-ousted Kevin McHale and company tried to pass off as a logo.

Ultimately, all you need to know about this thing is the description that Chris Creamer gave it on his website for identification purposes:

A wolf head next to a row of pine trees

Bill Simmons, who famously failed in his attempt to become Minnesota’s GM this summer, has a theory that every sports team should hire a VP of Common Sense whose sole role is to give a final sign-off on every decision before it’s made. It’s a solid concept, especially in this context. Because I’m pretty sure if you walked into the VPCS’ office and said “Just FYI, we’re going with The Wolf Head Next to a Row of Pine Trees for the new logo,” she would tell you that, no, you ought not do that.

Additional ridicule should be reserved for the fact that Minny’s relatively new alternate logo not only looks like it got it’s picture taken in front of the same JC Penny “Basketball Stars” photo backdrop as Emo Horse, but it also appears that the designer just downloaded the Amarok logo, opened it in Photoshop, hit “Edit –> Transform –> Flip Horizontal” and then took an early lunch.

Maybe it wasn’t just laziness though. I mean, I’m not a branding optimization consultancy expert, but I would think that half the point of having two logos is so that you can appeal to two different demographics. So this way, Minnesota captures both the Bob Ross fan demo with its main logo and the brazen thievery aficionado demo with the other. I’m pretty sure they don’t run in the same circles. I’ve been to the chat rooms.

twolves logo

Bob Ross called this landscape “Happy Trees and the Mad Dog.”

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Matt Moore 08.21.09 at 6:13 pm

to be fair, I feel like it should be “Aggressive Trees and the Mad Dog.” those are some aggressive trees. Whoa, boy, are they aggressive.

2 rockandroel 08.21.09 at 7:05 pm

I am glad they were able to fit 21 letters in the logo. All the best logos and visual icons in life are also stuffed with large numbers of letters.

3 Jared Wade 08.22.09 at 4:53 pm

Objectively, you’re certainly correct, Matt. But Bob Ross dabbled in a lot of pacifism, so I think he would still refer to them as “happy.”

4 katie 08.23.09 at 12:01 am

I don’t think you read the caption on the alternate – “A wolf head howling with a blue basketball in the background.” so, clearly that designer added the laces to the background and fully earned his paycheck.

5 The Real Thing 08.26.09 at 6:34 pm

HOLY CRAP THAT WOLF IS BIGGER THAN THE FOREST RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

The alternate logo looks like a wolf in a forest… of arrows. And the wolf in the main photo looks more like a ball with a wolf’s head. It looks like a toy you might find in a Carl’s Jr. kids meal. Come back next week and you’ll get a green one with an alligator’s head!

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